Trust me, i know a little bit about sucking balls. I’m sort of an expert.

Question: Do you know what sucks balls more than Ashli Orion?

Answer: Losing your phone. Duh!

I kinda sorta smoke a lot of kush, like A LOT, all day.

One of the many side effects is that you tend to forget important shit, like where you are, who is this random guy sleeping next to me, who’s car is this AND the most suckiest of them all, WHERE IS MY FUCKING PHONE!

That one is the most annoying because in 2009, having no phone makes you feel naked.

I know, your saying to yourself – “But you’re porn star Ashli Orion, you love to be naked”

Well not without my phone.

So, In closing, If you have been trying to call me and haven’t gotten a hold of me, it’s because I LOST MY FUCKING PHONE and I haven’t been ignoring you Dave Coulier.

*cheap plug alert* when i find my LOST FUCKING PHONE, i will be downloading official Ashli Orion mobile porn onto it. That you can be sure of

Here’s a pic to keep you excited Dave Coulier!

My fave position - Comet-the-doggy

peace out girlscout -

Ashli